I’m 15 and this is my first Ramadan as a revert and I’m on my 5th day of fasting. My parents would always question me and why I’m not eating breakfast or dinner and I would always refuse to give a straight answer and just tell them “You don’t understand”. And they would sometimes yell at me for not eating at all. Now it’s getting to a point where they most likely see a pattern in when i’m eating or not. I’m afraid they might find out I’m religious and force me to eat. Is it permissible for me to not fast during some days and make it up after ramadan? If not, then what are some alternatives?
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Assalamu alaikum brother,
Mashallah, you are trying your hardest. It’s hard being a revert, I know, as I live in a non-Muslim family.
I have experience in this matter, and I’m on my second Ramadan alhamduillah.
now this really depends on how nice your parents are on the topic of Islam. If they will be okay with it, then TELL THEM. I know it’s hard, and awkward, and everything else. But it’s what you have to do to let them understand.
however, like in my case if this is not an option, you must try to fast anyways. Wake up for suhoor and eat, maybe leave a “paper trail” like a used plate or something for them to not be concerned of you starving yourself.
try to schedule dinner at night time with your family, or be “super busy” with something, requiring you to come back home later.
REMEMBER that this is not a permanent solution, and you have 3 years left (if you are 15) that you have to live with your parents minimum until you are 18 and can fend for yourself.
the are going to have to find out at some point, so try to slowly butter them up to the idea. It’s hard, I know.
good luck my fellow revert brother!
jazakallah khair.
Breaking fast is not permissible for this reason. You could eat just a glass of water and biscuits in iftar time. After that, you can eat your meal after one or two hours so that they won’t know about the pattern. You can change the pattern, like, you can start eating your meal sometime 20 minutes later, sometime 40 minutes later from iftar time. And you can eat a little with them at night and tell them you will eat later. You can also ask in Hanafi fiqh regarding this to know better. I hope you can follow Islam properly.
This is not a legitimate reason to break fast, I think at one point you have to inform them about you converted into Islam. Would it be easy? No, at least you are not hiding from telling them what you believe in. You can eat before Fajr, and you fast the whole day until when its sunset you break your fast.
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